Today I gave my students a test.
Today I was told to give my students a test.
One that was not worthy of them.
One that is not worthy of me.
Not heeding the loud cries of a professional teacher, they told me:
you must
for us, for us, for us.
I am not here for you, I remind.
I am here to grow lil,
squirrelly,
funny,
crazy,
can’t-stop-moving-during-a-seven-minute-mini-lesson
seventh graders.
It’s glorious and ridiculous,
but I do it everyday believing in them–
day after day.
Under your unrealistic expectations,
I work
I function
I show up!
Today I gave my students a test that had no valid place in their learning.
Tomorrow you will evaluate me on the results of a test.
Yet, today I have no say in how I grow my students.
They say I have a Masters, that I’m a professional. Some even say I’m experienced.
Today I gave my students a test,
Knowing it was not the right thing to do,
Having exhausted every other option,
Not having the power to do the right thing.
Today I apologize to my sparkling students
who deserve to grow as artists and not be stifled by the system.